The Befores and Afters of Sawada Tsunayoshi
by Megamagical
Summary: For Sawada Tsunayoshi, there have always been befores and afters. 'Before I was dame. After Papa left. Before the world was twisted.' Or A more serious examination of Tsuna's poor childhood and the sealing of his flames


Tsuna's life has always been divided into two parts, the Before and the After. Before his father returned, and After the world became murky. When he was younger, Tsuna had no need to think like that, to divide his time in such strange ways. He lived in the moment, with happy laughter and bright smiles. He had his troubles, sure, but nothing could take the smile off his face completely. Of course, this was from Before, when everything was okay, when he had friends and didn't trip over nothing.

Tsuna had never been particularly popular or graceful, but he'd had friends and been able to walk down the steps without falling. Before, Tsuna was a smart little boy, doing well in class and pleasing Mama. Before, Mama cared about him and his troubles. Before, he had nice, good friends. He was even friends with Yamamoto and Kyoko, the school idols, Before. He'd been happy Before his father came home.

When his father, Iemitsu, came home, Tsuna was ecstatic! He'd never met the man before, but from the way Mama fawned over his calls and letters, Tsuna thought the man must be good and kind. After all, this was the man that made his sweet, caring Mama happy.

What Tsuna was not expecting was what his father had turned out to be. When his father knocked on the door, Tsuna ran to greet him. The man had kissed Mama sweetly and picked up Tsuna, cooing and calling Tsuna his "Tuna-fish!" Then he'd put Tsuna down, and another man entered the Sawada household. Iemitsu had introduced the man as his boss, Timoteo.

Tsuna hadn't felt safe around the old man, keeping a fair distance between them, despite Timoteo's urges to come closer. Tsuna wasn't sure what it was, but something told him to keep his distance. He did so and kept a warry eye on Iemitsu and Timoteo from then on.

Realizing that his father had willingly brought a dangerous man into the house to meet his wife and child, Tsuna swore from that moment on to never refer to the man as 'father' or any variation, so from that moment on, his father became 'Iemitsu' exclusively. He did so and kept a warry eye on Iemitsu and Timoteo from then on.

Their guests stayed for a week. During that time, Iemitsu drunk himself into oblivion continually, Mama and Iemitsu had plenty of "alone time" together, and Timoteo continued his attempts to move closer to Tsuna. One of these attempts included taking Tsuna to a nearby park with Iemitsu while Mama prepared dinner at home.

When they arrived at the park, Tsuna had left the adults behind to play on the park's playground equipment. The two men stood at the edge of the playground and watched him play. Tsuna had met up with some of his school friends, and they spent hours playing games and competing against each other. Eventually, Tsuna's friends left, and he was the only one remaining in the park. Then Tsuna and the men turned to leave as the sun began to set. Their walk home was uneventful, with Tsuna leading and Iemitsu and Timoteo trailing behind.

Something was going to happen. Tsuna could feel it. The same feeling that had told him of the danger Timoteo possessed was now telling him to be on guard. Something life changing was just moments away from occurring. It was also saying that the resulting changes would not be good. This worried Tsuna, but the feeling had warned him against even coming to the park with Timoteo and Iemitsu at all, which Tsuna had chosen to ignore. He'd made his choice, Tsuna knew, so whatever happened was his fault.

A Chihuahua viciously jumping out at him, growling angrily, was not the life changing moment Tsuna was expecting. Now, Tsuna was a fairly brave boy who wasn't scared of much, but one of the few things he was scared of happened to be tiny, ferocious dogs known as Chihuahuas. He'd screamed, though it sounded more like a squeaky shriek, crystal tears leaking from his chocolate eyes, and something warm weld up inside him. It spread through his veins, filling him with a strange calm and strong courage. Tsuna wiped his tears away and lifted his head, confidently facing the dog.

"Go," Tsuna said, his brown eyes flashing a foreign orange.

The Chihuahua growled a second more before its ears drooped, and it ran away, yipping in fear. Then Tsuna felt the warmth leave him, and he finally noticed the shocked, worried whispers of the adults behind him. He turned to face them when Iemitsu yanked him into a tight hug.

"I'm so sorry, Tuna-fish. So, so sorry," the man sobbed, "I couldn't protect you, and now you're in danger… It's all my fault… But my boss, Grandpa Timoteo, he says he can fix it. It'll hurt for a little bit, but you'll be safe, Tuna-fish. You and my dear Nana will be safe."

Tsuna whimpered and tried to cower away, only to be held even tighter by Iemitsu. Timoteo approached them, a little, orange flame lit his right index finger. Tsuna squirmed even more, desperate to escape. The feeling within him was screaming, shrieking how dangerous the small flame was. Tsuna was truly desperate now. Angry, scared tears poured down his face as he cried and wiggled, wanting nothing more than to be far away from the old man. Iemitsu's grip loosens as Timoteo draws closer.

"It's alright, Tsunayoshi. Don't cry. It will be okay. You'll be just fine," Timoteo whispers to him as the man presses his lit index finger to Tsuna's forehead.

Then the world started to change. Colors blurred together, his balance shifted dangerously, and the feeling that had been warning him to run away was now screaming all the louder. Shocked tears filled his eyes as he pressed his hands to his ears, futilely trying to muffle the intense screaming filling his mind.

Iemitsu pulled him close yet again, pressing Tsuna's face to the crook of his neck, "it's alright, Tuna-fish. I know that was scary, but you were so brave! I'm so proud of you. You're Papa's little soldier, Tuna-fish!"

"Yes, Tsunayoshi. You've done so very well. Your mother will be proud," Timoteo coos at him.

It was then that Tsuna knew. Iemitsu and Timoteo had no idea what they'd done to him, no idea what they'd stolen from him. That thought both angered and terrified him. After all, if they didn't know the results of whatever they'd just used on him, then why would they risk using it at all? Was the problem they wanted to fix really so dire that they'd use an untested procedure on a child?

The angry thoughts quickly left Tsuna's head. In fact, all thoughts did. His head was empty, mind blank, and he was just so tired. His tears dried as his head drooped against Iemitsu. He closed his eyes, and the murky, distorted world melted away as he drifted into a deep sleep.

As soon as Tsuna was asleep, Iemitsu had gently cradled his son in his arms and carried the boy back home with Timoteo at his side. Iemitsu greeted Nana sweetly before explaining that their darling Tuna-fish had worn himself out at the park and fell asleep on the way home. Nana laughed and ruffled the sleeping Tsuna's hair before send Iemitsu upstairs to put the child to bed.

The man entered his son's room and tucked him under the covers before pressing a kiss to his forehead, whispering "I love you, Tuna-fish" before gently closing the door and returning to his wife downstairs.

The next day, Tsuna awoke to a bizarre, twisted version of the world he knew so well and the bellows of the feeling that had once served as his danger sense. Tears filled his eyes, and he began to cry. Tsuna cried for days, and he did not stop until a week after Iemitsu and Timoteo had left their house and returned to where they'd come from.

When Tsuna had finally stopped crying, he'd realized that his life would now be drastically different. This was him now, the Tsuna After his flames were sealed. The Tsuna from before was someone he would never be again. It was then when he began to think in Befores and Afters, and he would continue to do so until he reached the tender age of thirteen.

Reborn tilts his fedora as he walked out of Namimori Airport. The town was quiet and simple enough, which would suit his agenda just fine. He was here to train the new Decimo, after all

Reborn set off and reached the Sawada residence in good time. He slipped his flyer into their mail before turning away to eye any possible places to observe the young Sawada. Once he'd climbed up the side of the house to an obscured part of the boy's windowsill, he settled down and began to watch.

The information Iemitsu had given him was mostly correct. Tsunayoshi was indeed clumsy, airheaded, and lacked any sort of talent or skill, but what he had not been told, however, was how detached he was, or how blank and listless his eyes were. The boy seemed to lack any motivation at all.

This was troubling. If Tsunayoshi did not have any motivations, then he did not have any Dying Will to resurrect him once Reborn shot him with a Dying Will Bullet. Oh how very troublesome this would be. Reborn would have to take a risk and shot the boy. Hopefully, somewhere deep down, Tsunayoshi was harboring a Dying Will of some sort.

Reborn waited in his hiding spot until he was sure Nana had taken his flyer. After she disappeared into the house, he made his way down to the door. He waited a few minutes before knocking on the door. Nana came to open the door moments later.

"Oh, hello, dear! Who are you?" She asked brightly.

"Ciaossu. I am Reborn, the home tutor, and I am here to tutor your son, Tsunayoshi." He answered curtly.

"Really? You're so young, but that must mean you're very smart then! Come inside! You should meet Tsuna."

She smiles and beckons him in, and he does so, internally both admiring and scoring her great trust in others. She guides him to the kitchen table, and he jumps up onto it while Nana calls her son down. The boy stumbles down the steps seconds later, barely managing to stay on his feet. He stops in front of the table and stares at Reborn.

"Who is this, Mama?" Tsuna murmurs, his voice soft and distant.

"This is Reborn, Tsuna dear. He is your new home tutor, so you should try to get along," Nana tells her son.

"Of course, Mama." Though it sounds like Tsuna currently isn't very mentally present, although he is extremely polite. Reborn counts that as one of Tsuna's positive qualities he was unaware of. This boy might not be so bad, he thinks, and he decides to give him a chance.

Reborn nods and stands before he jumps into the fluffy locks of his new student's hair and settles himself into a sitting position. "Come now, Tsuna. It's time for us to be going. You have school."

Tsuna grabs his things and heads towards the door before he addresses Reborn. "Are you coming with me?"

Reborn pats his new student's head gently and answers, "Yes. I am coming to observe you today."

"Alright."

Tsuna does not seem troubled by this, which both relieves and stresses Reborn. On one hand, it makes his job easier, but on the other, it indicates that something is wrong with his student. Tsuna should at least be a bit panicked, but he couldn't seem to care less about being observed.

They leave the house and begin making their way to Tsuna's school, Namimori Middle. On the way, they are met by Kyoko, the female idol of Namimori Middle.

Tsuna's expression changes slightly at the sight of her, and Reborn takes it as an indication of his crush of Kyoko.

"A crush, hmm, Tsuna? You should act on it, confess how you feel. No use bottling it up."

Tsuna shakes his head. "That's not it, Reborn. Why would you think such a thi-"

Before Tsuna could finish, Reborn jumps to the ground in front of Tsuna, and his chameleon, Leon, scampers into his hand, transforming into a green and black gun. Reborn aims quickly and shoots Tsuna in the forehead with a Dying Will Bullet.

However, Tsuna does not yell, and his clothing remains unripped and on his body. Instead, his eyes have turned a brilliant shade of orange, and a warm orange flame flickers on his forehead. Tsuna lifts his head to the sky, eyes shining with newly formed, unshed tears. The world was finally right again. No more distortion or murkiness. The world is finally as it should be. It's the world from Before.

A few tears trickle down his face before Tsuna before he turns to face Reborn. He looks at the infant for a moment before pulling him into his arms in a tight hug.

"Thank you, Reborn, thank you!" He whispers into his tutor's fedora, sobbing gently in relief.

Honestly, Reborn had no idea what had just occurred. From what he could tell, his student was maintaining Hyper Dying Will mode with ease, and the seal on his flames had shattered spectacularly.

Wait... The seal? Perhaps that was what had caused his student so much trouble. He would he to get Verde to look into the effects of flame sealing on humans, especially on children. In the meantime, he had more important things to attend to.

Reborn returns Tsuna's hug with a gentle hug of his own. "Of course, Tsuna. Now put that flame out and get us to school. I doubt your resident Skylark will take kindly to tardiness."

"You're right, Reborn," Tsuna says as his flame fizzles out. His voice is louder now, stronger. "We should get going."

And so they did. As they walked, Tsuna began to realize that there was no longer a need for Befores and Afters. He was free of such things now, and he even had a friend of sorts now. He was certain that everything would be alright now.

(Years later, Tsuna would think back to that naive thought and laugh at how very wrong he was.)


End file.
